Mark Zuckerberg stole my threads account
and I'm a little upset.
First of all:
There, now I feel better.
Except I don’t.
Because this image is how I felt briefly (well, not exactly brief. I gave myself about 30 minutes) when I discovered my Threads account was unrecoverable after 4 days of having it.
And you may be thinking, “You silly bitch, you don’t own the platforms you haunt.” I know. I was in branding, I KNOW.
But also, it wasn’t about the platform— or Mark. Bless his ghoulish little soul— it was about the way I’ve been trying to navigate my entire life, and it sort of clicked into place over the last few days in a way I have rarely experienced.
And you may read my Substack notes, or my Morning Dumps (or nothing of mine) and think, this person is either off their medication, or ON the wrong medication, but the truth is… this is just how I am.
Always.
Finally.
And I say finally, because I’ve spent years being told not to trust my voice. That who I am is too much, with literally… decades worth of evidence to back that up.
My therapist (yes, don’t worry, I speak to people.) says I have metacognitive skills that her therapy can’t treat because I don’t get hung up in a lot of ways and that then confuses most people.
Yet, the people who get confused often blame me. And that’s broken logic (take it from a bot).
Here are some things I get called when I feel a glaze of dissonance slide over someone’s eyes before they snap back to life, and as their suborbital muscles clench in my direction:
‘Mean’
‘Arrogant’
‘Stupid’
‘Crazy’
‘Wrong’
‘Overreacting’
‘Sensitive’
Overtly and inappropriately sexual
And while the latter is my secret weapon to save myself from curling into a fetal position, wielded like a sabre against the ridiculousness of the general population who takes themselves way too fucking seriously, I can’t help but stand up and say:
Fuck you, Mark Zuckerberg, give me back the ONE place where people actually seemed to recognize and enjoy my specific brand of ME.
(And as someone who has clearly enjoyed his fair share of bullying, heightened by public exposure, allowing an AI to tell me I’ve broken community standards by simply being myself? Is a total dick move.)
The fact that I can’t have a human review this expulsion is bonkers. Even Zac Morris was given multiple chances, and he had his underage friends do bikini photos! IN THE SCHOOL!
An AI said I was maybe a bot, I posted proof I was indeed a flesh-and-blood mortal, and I still got rejected without reason.
Sigh
I am a lot. Duh.
But I am not mean.
Do I say things other people shy away from? Yes. Because they need to have someone be honest with them.
Do I say things people don’t always understand? Totally. Miscommunication is why we have the current US president. No one thinks he’s actually COOL. Come on now. (I’m Canadian, look— we almost fucked up, too.)
Do I say things that confuse people? Yes. I have never had so many people DM me to ask if they’ve offended me. And I love it, because then I get to say: no, you sweetheart. I love that you cared enough to ask— thank you— instead of letting your confusion be MY fault, my burden, mine to carry around with me like (Welp, there goes another one who won’t talk to me).
That is humanity.
Recognizing that your confusion does not equate to the person you find confusing being the asshole is a skill, a test of upbringing, and a sign of emotional intelligence.
We don’t blame the dog for not speaking English, either. Only assholes do.
It’s the same type of ideology that leads people to treat children as if they are deficient. Except, I am not a child, or a dog, or stupid.
Confusion is simple, but we’re trained out of it because we’re made to feel like morons for feeling it. Because it implies hierarchy and some sort of backward ass morality structure that is made up.
Confusion is: Asking curious questions, getting interested, and being brave enough to go the hard route (where we learn) vs. the easy route (where we pretend we know everything).
I am not infallible. I am human (regardless of what Threads AI says).
So, can we not all come together to see each other’s humanity?
Please.
I promise, if I comment on your work, or your note, or anything, it’s not me saying anything but this:
I see you. I am offering something I see. I am teasing you. I enjoy you. That’s it. That’s the full extent of me poking around on the internet and sharing my art. Sometimes it just comes wrapped in an overtly sexual shell.
So I’m asking again, please…
And with the full force of who we are, can we say, once and for all:
Let it be known I started here you silly bitch while listening to your AI reading voice. Fuck you Mark.